You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
