Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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