11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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