Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
im six kinds of drunk right now
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
