I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
