She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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