best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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