i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
