is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
