At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
The power of my boobs compel you
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
