Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
