what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
