i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
