It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
