Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
