how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
