Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
