I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
