So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize