I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
