Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
