White coat. Heels.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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