I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
