Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
