girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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