Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
