Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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