i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize