Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
