I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
