Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
