Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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