Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize