Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i would punch a child for taco bell
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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