she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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