I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woke up backwards on a recliner
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
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