thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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