Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
