we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
