I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
