I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
he just fucked me for my cheese..
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I have post one night stand depression
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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