So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize