Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Randomize
