He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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