Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
