Dual....:-)
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
God, I missed his penis.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
