i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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