please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
