I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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