I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
